BOOK OF TEDS

I

I'd like to send you two free round-trip tickets to Griswold, Michigan. Don't look. It's not on your map. It only exists in the pages of my new novel, "The Book of Teds". If you decide to visit, you will meet Ted, the Tubs, Trotsky and the Toots, lead tubist of a jazz band. If music isn't high on your list, you could attend a lecture given by Theodore Lawrence Fairfax III, Professional Garbologist. Or curl up with a best seller written by Theodore Harrington entitled, "The History of Insects on Your Windshield; How to Identify Them and Why They Do It".

 This all expense paid tour includes a free dinner at Shawnesey's Seafood, Sushi Restaurant, and Lounge. A dessert of your choice is waiting for you at Chez Wendel. Top that off with a night at Griswold's Bowling and Mental Health Center where you can combine an evening of ten-pin with a group therapy session. Need an escort? Henrietta Blout's Affection Connection is the place to call. All this and more are yours if you purchase my book.

If you are interested in a humoristic novel that is a mixture of "Lake Wobegon Days" populated with zany characters that seem straight from a Carl Hiaasen book, then the "BOOK OF TEDS" should be on your reading list. Two of these chapters have been published. One in Circle Magazine and another in an anthology, Feral Parakeets. I hope you decide to take me up on this offer before the earth ends in Chapter Twelve.

Sincerely,

Judith Tracy

BOOK OF TEDS

THE HISTORY OF GRISWOLD - Foreword written by Theodore M. Tinsley, Professor of history at Brinhope University and blood kin to Abraham Griswold, the founding father of Griswold. Ted and Jolene inherit Happy Harry's General Store and We Be Furs and The Like.

 TOOTIN WITH TED - Ted, the Tubs, Trotsky turns his dream of being a jazz tubist into reality.

 SECRET AGENT MAN - Ted Chernowitz believes he is a spy. His best friend Boris Boleslavski believes his wife is unfaithful. Yetta, Ted's mother, knows her son has a screw loose. Just last month he thought he was a golden retriever and bit the mailman.

 DECEASED AND DEPRESSED - Failing sitcom on Griswold's Broadcasting Station. Madame Tallulah's nose just fell off. Ted Tinsdale, the pitchman, to the rescue. Another corpse is on the way.

 SPLAT - Ted Harrington II queries Plimpton Publishing with his manuscript entitled, "The History of Insects on Your Windshield; How to Identify Them and Why They Do It." It's not easy getting published when you don't get along with your editor.

 COME AND LISTEN TO MY STORY 'BOUT A MAN NAMED TED - Follow Theodore L. Fairfax III life from riches to rags. He is searching for proof of an alien conspiracy in dumpsters.

 LOOKING FOR MR. GOODBIRD - Ted the grouse is searching for the meaning of life and falls in love with a flamingo. But nothing comes easy for this handicapped bird. His heartthrob is already married to a horse.

 ONLY IN AMERICA - Theodore Maynard Johnson inherits the old family business, Bovine Devices of Swayne Michigan. Can he turn a profit and support his mother selling bullwhips?

 TO STEAL A HEART - Ted Griswold, bachelor, psychiatrist, and petty thief, is blackmailed into marriage. Can he find happiness living with the queen of tacky?

 WHEEL OF MISFORTUNE - Ted Arnold is waiting to be re-incarnated. Will Sarah, his soul mate die in time to play the heavenly version, "Game of Life?"  Will Ted win his bet with God? 

THE CHOSEN - Tear down Meak House and all will be destroyed. Only Theodore Meak and his family survive. Why? Theodore is willing to sacrifice his daughter, Lily, to prove his theory.

 TED-E BEARS ON PARADE - In conjunction with National Teddy Bear Day, the city hosts a beauty contest with a twist. Can a display of men in Speedo's put Griswold on the map?

 WE LOVE ETHEL - Ted Boboo is hired to defend, Ethel Pimperknell when she is indicted for murder. Can a man who's bought-and-paid law degree keep his client from the electric chair?

 NOVEL-TISEMENTS - Ted Harrington, best selling author of "The History of Insects on Your Windshield," discovers his fiction manuscript, "Dial M for Marvin," riddled with advertisements.            

PAYMENT BY PAYPAL ONLY

You will automatically be sent to a site where you can download the book in PDF File